My
Memento
Mori
Page
Welcome to my page devoted entirely to my all-time favourite episode of the X-Files. I've watched this episode so many times now that I'm wearing out my tape. I can't help it. It's so totally worth it!!! Anyway, this page will let you share my love for this absolutely amazing episode. Enjoy!!!
Scully's
Journal
Entries
These are the entries in Scully's journal to Mulder that she was writing throughout this episode. I'm still wondering whether or not he kept it. (hmmm...)
For the first time I feel time like a heartbeat, the seconds pumping in my breast like a reckoning; the numinous mysteries that once seemed so distant and unreal threatening clarity in the presence of a truth entertained not in youth, but only in its passage. I feel these words as if their meaning were weight being lifted from me, knowing that you will read them and share my burden as I have come to trust no other. That you should know my heart, look into it, finding there the memory and experience that belong to you, that are you, is a comfort to me now as I feel the tethers loose and the prospects darken for the continuance of a journey that began not so long ago, and which began again with a faith shaken and strengthened by your convictions. If not for which I might never have been so strong now as I cross to face you and look at you incomplete, hoping that you will forgive me for not making the rest of the journey with you.
In med school, I learned that cancer arrives in the body unannounced, a dark stranger who takes up residence, turning its new home against itself. This is the evil of cancer: that it starts as an invader, but soon becomes one with the invaded, forcing you to destroy it, but only at the risk of destroying yourself. It is science's demon possession, my treatments, science's attempt at exorcism. Mulder, I hope that in these terms you might know it and know me, and accept a stranger so many recognize but cannot ever completely cast out. And if the darkness should have swallowed me as you read this, you must never think there was the possibility of some secret intervention, something you might have done. And though we've travelled far together, this last distance must necessarily be travelled alone.
I have not written to you in the last 24 hours because the treatment has weakened my spirit, as well as my body. Mulder, it's difficult to describe to you the fear of facing an enemy which I can neither conquer nor escape. Penny Northern has taken a downturn. I now look at her with a respect that can only come from one who is about to walk the same dark path. Seeing her, I can't help but see myself in a month or a year. I pray that I have her courage to face this journey. Mulder, I feel you close, though I know you are now pursuing your own path. For that I am grateful, more than I could ever express. I need to know you're out there if I am ever to see through this.
Other
Memento
Mori
Quotes
Here are the other quotes I felt deserved mention here.
Mulder:(bringing Scully flowers) I, uh, I stole these from some guy with a broken leg down the hall. He, uh, won't be able to catch me. (Does he sound nervous, or is it just me?)
Mulder:(after Scully has told him the tumor can't be treated) I refuse to believe that, I-
Scully: For all the times that I have said that to you, I am as certain about this as you have ever been.
Cancer Man: It's funny. I always thought of you as Fox Mulder's patron. You'd think under your egis that he wouldn't be consigned to a corner of the basement.
Skinner: At least he doesn't take an elevator up to get to work. (Ouch!)
Mulder: The truth will save you, Scully. I think it'll save both of us.
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